MLU FORUM

MLU FORUM (http://www.mapleleafup.net/forums/index.php)
-   The Sergeants' Mess (http://www.mapleleafup.net/forums/forumdisplay.php?f=13)
-   -   Beware (http://www.mapleleafup.net/forums/showthread.php?t=739)

Vets_Dottir 29-07-03 04:28

Beware
 
My kids dad sent this to me today. We aren't on speaking terms :p

HAZARDOUS MATERIALS

INFORMATION SYSTEM MATERIAL SAFETY DATA SHEET

WOMEN: A Chemical Analysis
ELEMENT: Woman
SYMBOL: WO
DISCOVERER: Adam
ATOMIC MASS: 50kg - 250 kg (100 to 550 lbs)
OCCURENCE: Copious quantities throughout the world

PHYSICAL PROPERTIES:
1. Surface usually covered with a painted film.
2. Boils at nothing, freezes without reason.
3. Melts if given special treatment.
4. Bitter if incorrectly used.
5. Found in various states ranging from virgin metal to common ore.
6. Yields to pressure applied to correct points.

CHEMICAL PROPERTIES:
1. Has a great affinity for gold, silver, platinum, and precious stones.
2. Absorbs great quantities of expensive substances.
3. May explode spontaneously without prior warning, and for no known reason.
4. Insoluble in liquids, but activity greatly increased by saturation in alcohol.
5. Most powerful money-reducing agent known to man.

COMMON USES:
1. Highly ornamental, especially in sports cars.
2. Can be a great aid to relaxation.

TESTS:
1. Pure specimen turns rosy pink when discovered in natural state.
2. Turns green when placed beside a better specimen.

HAZARDS:
***Extremely dangerous to possess more than one specimen at a time.***

Jon Skagfeld 29-07-03 08:25

Beware part 2
 
...so, what are the bi-products of this issue...

Vets_Dottir 29-07-03 08:50

Re: Beware part 2
 
Quote:

Originally posted by Jon Skagfeld
...so, what are the bi-products of this issue...

D E P E N D E N T OFF-SPRING therefore IMMORTALITY!

:D :p

DaveCox 29-07-03 10:00

re. analysis
 
Obviously written originally by a very wise man, a person of great wisdom and powers of observation.
He should have a Nobel Prize for science on the strength of his observational and analytical skills.


Carmen : the by-product, of course, can only occur as the result of a chemical reaction involving the addition of a catalyst - A MAN.:p :D

Vets_Dottir 29-07-03 13:23

Re: re. analysis
 
Quote:

Originally posted by DaveCox
Obviously written originally by a very wise man, a person of great wisdom and powers of observation.
He should have a Nobel Prize for science on the strength of his observational and analytical skills.


Carmen : the by-product, of course, can only occur as the result of a chemical reaction involving the addition of a catalyst - A MAN.:p :D


Not the whole man perhaps, just some little swimmer...and only if it works. Right?

Gawd... I'm ashamed of myself for posting that blurb that J sent me. I'm no credit to my gender with that posting:o and neither are YOU TWO for what you replied!!!:p

Mark W. Tonner 29-07-03 14:53

Re: Re: re. analysis
 
It takes two to tango.........yip yap yip yap yip yap yip yap yip yap yip yap yip yap......... and one little swimmer.....:p :eek:

Vets_Dottir 29-07-03 16:38

Re: Re: Re: re. analysis
 
Quote:

Originally posted by Mark W. Tonner
It takes two to tango.........yip yap yip yap yip yap yip yap yip yap yip yap yip yap......... and one little swimmer.....:p :eek:

WANNA DANCE?;);)?????????????

HAaaaaHa HA hahahahaa HA:D :D :p

Mark W. Tonner 29-07-03 17:25

Re: Re: Re: Re: re. analysis
 
Quote:

Originally posted by Vets_Dottir
WANNA DANCE?;);)?????????????

HAaaaaHa HA hahahahaa HA:D :D :p

Oh ! Oh !............... :eek: :rolleyes: :p they still haven't figured out how to do that long distance yet....:p :D

Vets_Dottir 29-07-03 20:40

:p :p :rolleyes: :)

Mark W. Tonner 30-07-03 01:33

Quote:

Originally posted by Vets_Dottir
:p :p :rolleyes: :)
Gee, your 400th Post and you didn't actually say anything...cat got your tongue or are you still trying to figure out how it can be done by long distance :p :D ;)

Garry Shipton (RIP) 01-08-03 23:29

Re: Re: Re: Re: re. analysis
 
Quote:

Originally posted by Vets_Dottir
WANNA DANCE?;);)?????????????

HAaaaaHa HA hahahahaa HA:D :D :p

Geez Miss Yappy,your original quote about women sounded like my wife(Boss).While readingit,got goosebumps & looked up the stairs to see if she was around.Fortuneately,she's out on our deck drinking one of those new vodka something or other drinks(OH ya VODKA ICE) all you women drink before you start bossing us around.OOPS she just came in,Gotta go now or else."IS THE BBQ READY YET?WHEN WE GONNA EAT_ARE YOU STILL ON THE COMPUTER>HAVE YOU TAKEN YOUR SHOWER YET.Boy oh boy!!Scary.

Vets_Dottir 02-08-03 01:00

Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: re. analysis
 
Quote:

Originally posted by Garry Shipton
Geez Miss Yappy,your original quote about women sounded like my wife(Boss).While readingit,got goosebumps & looked up the stairs to see if she was around.Fortuneately,she's out on our deck drinking one of those new vodka something or other drinks(OH ya VODKA ICE) all you women drink before you start bossing us around.OOPS she just came in,Gotta go now or else."IS THE BBQ READY YET?WHEN WE GONNA EAT_ARE YOU STILL ON THE COMPUTER>HAVE YOU TAKEN YOUR SHOWER YET.Boy oh boy!!Scary.
Behind every accomplished man is a good woman!!!

BEHIND EVERY GOOD MAN IS AN ASTONISHED WOMAN!!!!:D :D :D :cool:

Vets_Dottir 02-08-03 01:08

Well... I understand why Vodka could be necessary. Its not in womens nature to be bossy... we're forced into having to be bossy by avoidant men and some of us need Vodka to get in the bossy-mode:p

Garry Shipton (RIP) 02-08-03 08:05

Bossy??
 
Geez,now I'm really despondent!!Heck she's bossy even in her sleep--AND SHE's sober??

DaveCox 02-08-03 09:09

Bossy??
 
Its not in womens nature to be bossy...

Oh yeah - really - since when????????:D

Vets_Dottir 02-08-03 10:32

Re: Bossy??
 
Quote:

Originally posted by DaveCox
Its not in womens nature to be bossy...

Oh yeah - really - since when????????:D


Geez Dave...what is it about you that your partner should have to sink to the level of bossy-ness (OIY...:eek: )Do you have a steady stock of VODKA in the house? Hmmm.

When you move to the Island... and if I come there for a visit, I'll have to meet this poor woman:)

Bob Moseley (RIP) 02-08-03 12:14

Bossy??
 
Hey Mum - can I come out of the corner yet?

Vets_Dottir 02-08-03 12:30

Re: Bossy??
 
Quote:

Originally posted by Bob Moseley
Hey Mum - can I come out of the corner yet?
And will you be NICE if you come out of your corner??? Huh? Will yah?...(yeah...OK)...

MUMSY YAPPY:p


All times are GMT +2. The time now is 22:42.

Powered by vBulletin® Version 3.8.4
Copyright ©2000 - 2025, Jelsoft Enterprises Ltd.
Copyright © Maple Leaf Up, 2003-2016