Quote:
Originally posted by Bill Mulholland
To all the great folks on MLU, and especially the " Ottawa ROTTERS" have a great and Blessed Christmas.
Cheers, Bill
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Bill..
The same to you and yours...
And to all our MLU friends at Christmas...
If you find the season difficult and you have to check in this is what you may hear...
Answering Machine at the Mental Hospital:
Hello, and welcome to the mental health hospital.
If you are obsessive-compulsive, press 1 repeatedly.
If you are co-dependent, please ask someone to press 2 for you.
If you have multiple personalities, press 3,4,5 and 6.
If you are paranoid, we know who you are and what you want.
Stay on the line so we can trace your call.
If you are delusional, press 7 and your call will be forwarded to the
mother ship.
If you are schizophrenic, listen carefully and a small voice will tell you
which number to press.
If you are manic-depressive, it doesn't matter which number you press, no
one will answer.
If you are dyslexic, press 96969696969696.
If you have a nervous disorder, please fidget with the pound key until a
representative comes on the line.
If you have post-traumatic stress disorder, s-l-o-w-l-y &
c-a-r-e-f-u-l-l-y press 0-0-0.
If you are bi-polar, please leave a message after the beep or before the
beep or after the beep. Please wait for the beep.
If you have short-term memory loss, press 9.
If you have short-term memory loss, press 9.
If you have short-term memory loss, press 9.
If you have low self-esteem, please hang up. Our operators are too busy to
talk with you.
If you are menopausal, hang up, turn on the fan, lie down and cry. You
won't be crazy forever.
If you are blonde, don't press any buttons, you'll just mess it up.
Merry Christmas to all....