Hi again.

Derek, you have me thinking back on some other things I've been interested in or began and they got derailed by life or unexpected events. Two that come to mind are creative things.

The first was that back in 1982 I was working on building up a portfolio to try and get into Emily Carr College (school of art). As far back as I, and family, can remember, I was always drawing and making things. I attended a couple or so life drawing courses (live models, clothed and unclothed) an artist friend was teaching and people, including him, used to stop their drawing and watch me draw, mesmerized. Thats AFTER I was finally able to get over my extreme panic reactions of shaking while standing in front of the drawing board afraid to start ... and Richard (teacher) came up behiond me and said, "Jesus Carman, I've never seen anyone so intimidated in my whole life" ... I told him to bugger off and leave me alone with my stagefright. I had a lot of talent and expression in my works but definately very undisciplined and undeveloped. People who had done the full 4 years courses and were excellent artists comments, Good lord Carman, I've been an artist forever and did 4 years of art school and I STILL can't do what you do.

My kids dad, a master in music and major talent, years later once said after seeing my drawings from those classes, "I don't know how someone with SO much talent can be such a loser" (yeah ... that still bites, but from him it truly was a real appreciation for something anyways )

Well ... okay ... here's me finally with some serious goals and about to start down that road. Before I had my portfolio together and presented to Emily Carr school ... I had to change my priorities as my youngest born joined me insides and redirected my path from artist to Mommy. I never really picked it up seriously again and am still undeveloped ... and now the arthritis is a limit. I tried a few times, but I lost the zing and oomph for it. I even sold a fw small things though

Another thing I started, not really thinking it through realistically as a Mom ... was I took and passed the first level of a makeup artists course, end goal being wanting to be a make up artist ... but more thought brought me to my senses about the hours and being Mom often would be a problem. I'm actually glad Canada Student Loans approved my loan for the 2nd level too late for me to take it, so at least I only had to repay for one level (which I did and made CSL happy) Again ... the arthritis would have ruined that career for me anyways, so ... all is well and not too disappointing.

Time for a and to ponder what career choices I might go for now, as I is ...