Alex, Alex, Alex,
I see it will be a chore dragging you thru the last century ...How many times do I have to tell you that I wear a digital watch. My computer has a digital clock, as does my microwave, stove and furnace controller. Nary an analog chronometer to be seen much less any "hands" (which in reality look like "arms"). It's called advanced technology. Try it, you will like it and you will never again at noon have to look outside to determine if it is AM or PM.
Good news on the Clive situation. At least the girls will have someone suave to serve.