[Keith Webb]

Howard the farmer was in the fertilised egg business. He had several hundred young layers called 'pullets' and eight or ten cockerels, whose job it was to fertilise the eggs.

The farmer kept records and any cockerel that didn't perform went into the pot and was replaced. This took an awful lot of his time so he bought a set of tiny bells and attached them to his cockerels.

Each bell had a different tone so Howard could tell from a distance, which cockerel was performing so now he could sit on the porch and fill out an efficiency report simply by listening to the bells.

The farmer's favourite cockerel was Kevin and a very fine specimen he was too, but on this particular morning Howard noticed Kevin's bell hadn't rung at all, so he went to investigate.

All the other cockerels were chasing pullets, bells-a-ringing.

The pullets, hearing the cockerels coming, would run for cover but, to farmer Howard's amazement, Kevin had his bell in his beak, so it couldn't ring.

He'd sneak up on a pullet, do his job and walk on to the next one.

Howard was so proud of Kevin, he entered him in the Ganmain Fair and Kevin became an overnight sensation among the judges.

The result was that the judges not only awarded Kevin the No Bell Piece Prize but they also awarded him the Pulletsurprise as well.

Clearly Kevin was a politician in the making: who else but a politician could figure out how to win two of the most highly coveted awards on our planet by being the best at sneaking up on the populace and screwing them when they weren't paying attention.

Do you know a Pullitician called Kevin?