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#1
05-09-04, 06:36
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Kilt goof
The Kilt Goof
Carman: Sorry to hear about the absence of excitement this Labor Day weekend on MLU. So here is an old soldiers war story. Remember, you asked for this. As an old vet I love this captive audience I have on MLU. When the story gets boring you can’t see your audience get up and walk away. I guess, as every old soldier knows that there were times of tragedy and times of humor and some were through the efforts of practical jokers. During the fall of 39 I paraded around in civilian clothes for a couple of weeks then the word came one afternoon, report to quartermaster stores which was in University armories, where I would be issued my uniform and equipment which was full highland dress. I could hardly believe my ears. I sat passively on a bench waiting for my name to be called. I then marched into quarter stores, which was full of crowns and stripes from the World War 1. One of these military Gods was a kindly old ruddy-faced quartermaster who said hold out your arms and he loaded me down with kilt, boots, web, hose tops, Glengarry, sporran and so many other things. God almighty I thought with all this gear and a nine and a half pound le Enfield rifle Geez if I ever fall down, shit I will never be able to get up again and will probably miss the whole damn war. I struggled back to the group that I was with and began sorting out and trying to understand what in the hell everything was for. If I had been a true Scot and worth my Haggis I would have known without having to ask anyone. So when I held up my hose tops, as you know they have no feet in them just a strap crossed the instep, I was dumbfounded. A crusty old soldier behind me who had came from New York to join the Canadian army and was like a character out of the dead end kids leaned over to me and in a very serious voice said God Mac, they have given you defective merchandise you don’t have to take that shit. Go right back and give the quarters Hell. As his name was Joe Cambell I thought there must have been some Scots knowledge within him. So I raced back to stores, right up to the head of the line and through my hose tops on the front of the counter and with the voice of indignation voiced my complaint to that kindly old WW1 soldier. But, when the ruddy complexion on his face changed to a volcanic red I knew I had made a very very grave error. I now realized what the term (in deep shit meant) I can tell you those hose tops and myself made an exit from that room that would have put Jesse Owens to shame. I can still hear his voice ringing in my ears and I think in my haste what he was saying “Somebody get that crazy son of a bitch out of here before I kill him.” Once outside I had to brace myself against the Army wall as I was shaking and trembling so much. I now knew what the meaning of that old saying was. That War is Hell. 
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#2
05-09-04, 07:06
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lordy lordy
You slay me Norm ... I'm laughing so hard tears are running down my dammed face and am trying hard to keep 'em from running down me legs too LMAO
Love the story ... this MLU is full of treasures. You're definately one of them. Thanks. I needed that. And by the way, the purpley rose??? is MY desktop image now. Gorgeous image!!! NO I most certainly will NOT give it back to you, but will to Betty if she asks me. That pore lass ... imagine... all thse years with you  I suspect yor verra much a practical joker yoreself...  Carman 
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#4
05-09-04, 23:00
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Hey Hello Mary
Quote:
 I love this place. You never know what to expect when you crack open a thread but usually learn something new and amazing and lots of loud laughter... ah, the highs and lows of livin' ... all HeRE in the MLU. 
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#6
08-09-04, 22:27
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For Norm Cromie-Hosetops
Norm,I had the same sensation when I got my first kit.Nobody explained that 1)Wear sweat absorbing socks, 2)put on hosetops 3)put the flashes on the hosetops, 4)put on your brogues, 5)put on & button up your spats!!Hell,I've seen rookies on parade wearing the hosetops.no socks with their brogues.Some have even worn their lovat hose under the hosetops & some have worn their lovat hose under their spats.You also have your horse hair sporran & leather sporran.I can't count how many times members of the pipe bands I've been in,have worn one or the other when they would show up on parade.The Pipe Major finally had one whole evening on proper dress for the rookies.Those were the days.By the way.they're punishment was to buy the beer after parades.Boy!they learned quickly & we profited by our thirst
Garry
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#7
08-09-04, 23:22
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Re: For Norm Cromie-Hosetops
Quote:
They just didn't know the permutations of dress in a Highland Infantry Battalion.
__________________
PRONTO SENDS
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#8
09-09-04, 00:17
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Hey JON
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#9
09-09-04, 00:24
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Re: Hey JON
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BTW, I'm not a dude...I'm a WASP. So, now that the 'skeeters are pretty well gonzo, I suppose you're now applying neatsfoot oil to your mukluks, combing out the fur on your parka and polishing the lens on your ski mask, huh? Getting ready for Winterpeg's best...at least you have a bunker to hunker
__________________
PRONTO SENDS
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#10
09-09-04, 00:55
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Re: Re: Hey JON
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So ... a VIKING WASP then. Hmmmm (QUICK someone ... I have a rough idea what WASP means but not clear ... only know that WASPY women usually mans a derogatory "nasty cutting rude woman" but I know its a military type term) Yep ... gotta go bag me some fur and hide to make those mukluks though, and buy me some new shoes (HORSESHOES) but shall spend much of my winter hunkered down in some bunker. Now, where the heck did I park my Red River Cart again? I need it to get the hides home.  PS: am glad to hear you aren't too shabby. Good to be somewhat presentable for mingling with the outside world, eh? grin
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#11
09-09-04, 01:18
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Re: Pixie
WASP = "White Anglo Saxon Protestant". It is generally used today in a derogatory manner, suggesting some holier-than-thou, high-society type who frowns upon the rest of us. In actual fact, that is a really just a social convention evolved at the behest of those who resented British rule in North America. Hell, I'm a WASP, and I'm only marginally better than everybody else...
The term has come to imply the same nastiness as some of the traditional names describing Jews, Catholics, Asians or for that matter, Muslims. That it's still in widespread use and is accepted where the use of the other words would brand one as a racist, I find personally repulsive and a double standard which damns the false icon of multiculturalism and equal rights.
__________________
SUNRAY SENDS AND ENDS :remember :support
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#12
09-09-04, 01:39
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Quote:
 : (couldn't resist that one... you BEGGED for it  Thank you Geoff, for explaining 'WASP' ... and your thoughts in general about stereo-typing and such. You certainly reflect many of my own attitudes and values about these things. I may not know a lot of specifics, but I certainly know the concepts and negative dynamics of much. Anything with an -ism usually upsets me because of how they usually place their -isms above all others, and at others detriments/expense usually. Sigh. Frustrating. Karmen
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#13
09-09-04, 03:14
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Quote:
__________________
SUNRAY SENDS AND ENDS :remember :support
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#14
09-09-04, 03:35
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Quote:
You'll never see it coming until it's too late :
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#15
09-09-04, 03:55
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Pee Ess
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APRIL 26, 2003 (my gawd ... havee I been here THIS long? No wonder I'm more nuts than ever )Your post: Quote:
I still haven't been able to "listen" to whats on that link... does that make you LUCKY SUN-ray? The YAPs has spoke
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