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  #1  
Old 05-12-06, 05:19
Jeff Gordon Jeff Gordon is offline
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Default COROWA 07 Who's bring a bike?

Hi all,
Just wondering how many bike will be there so I can get some more from up here interested in bringing there's down.
So far I have 3 definate's from Brisbane.
Jeff
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  #2  
Old 05-12-06, 10:51
Keith Webb's Avatar
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Default Bike

I'll be bringing my WW2 BSA pushbike... which may be for sale following the event.
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  #3  
Old 05-12-06, 13:55
Jeff Gordon Jeff Gordon is offline
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Default

You know Keith you have to ride it all the way to the airport
Jeff
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  #4  
Old 05-12-06, 15:18
Geoff Winnington-Ball (RIP)'s Avatar
Geoff Winnington-Ball (RIP) Geoff Winnington-Ball (RIP) is offline
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Default

Quote:
Originally posted by Jeff Gordon
You know Keith you have to ride it all the way to the airport
Jeff
That would just about kill 'im...
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  #5  
Old 05-12-06, 20:37
Keith Webb's Avatar
Keith Webb Keith Webb is offline
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Default Riding

Quote:
Originally posted by Jeff Gordon
You know Keith you have to ride it all the way to the airport
Jeff
'fraid I'll be claiming the excuse of filming so someone else will have that pleasure and privilege.

And that's enough cheek out of you, Jif!
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  #6  
Old 05-12-06, 21:19
Geoff Winnington-Ball (RIP)'s Avatar
Geoff Winnington-Ball (RIP) Geoff Winnington-Ball (RIP) is offline
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Default Re: Riding

Quote:
Originally posted by Keith Webb
And that's enough cheek out of you, Jif!
Fat chance of THAT, my friend...
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  #7  
Old 06-12-06, 13:06
Jeff Gordon Jeff Gordon is offline
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Default

Sorry Keith you don't get out of it that easy, we are going to mount a tripod on the handle bars!
Jeff
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  #8  
Old 06-12-06, 20:35
Keith Webb's Avatar
Keith Webb Keith Webb is offline
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Default Tripod

Now that would make for some funny footage!
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  #9  
Old 06-12-06, 23:16
Tony Smith's Avatar
Tony Smith Tony Smith is offline
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Default

Quote:
Originally posted by Jeff Gordon
Sorry Keith you don't get out of it that easy, we are going to mount a tripod on the handle bars!
Jeff
And hitch a Limber and 25pdr on to the back!
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  #10  
Old 06-12-06, 23:19
Euan McDonald's Avatar
Euan McDonald Euan McDonald is offline
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Default Bike!!

Was that a "town bike "or "wheeled bike"?
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Trailer No27 Limber
Trailer, Cario cargo
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  #11  
Old 06-12-06, 23:50
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Default Re: Bike!!

Quote:
Originally posted by Euan McDonald
Was that a "town bike "or "wheeled bike"?
Oi! Keep it nice!

Are you guys picking on me?
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  #12  
Old 07-12-06, 00:49
Geoff Winnington-Ball (RIP)'s Avatar
Geoff Winnington-Ball (RIP) Geoff Winnington-Ball (RIP) is offline
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Default Re: Re: Bike!!

Quote:
Originally posted by Keith Webb
Oi! Keep it nice!

Are you guys picking on me?
Keefy, far be it from us to be picking on YOU...
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  #13  
Old 07-12-06, 01:00
Keith Webb's Avatar
Keith Webb Keith Webb is offline
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Default Re: Re: Re: Bike!!

Quote:
Originally posted by Geoff Winnington-Ball
Keefy, far be it from us to be picking on YOU...
Oh yeah? Not very far I'd say

Just remember, I have the "power of the DVD revenge." And therefore the ultimate say.
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  #14  
Old 07-12-06, 01:06
Geoff Winnington-Ball (RIP)'s Avatar
Geoff Winnington-Ball (RIP) Geoff Winnington-Ball (RIP) is offline
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Default Re: Re: Re: Re: Bike!!

Quote:
Originally posted by Keith Webb
Oh yeah? Not very far I'd say

Just remember, I have the "power of the DVD revenge." And therefore the ultimate say.
On the other hand, me, Hanno and Karmen have admin access on MLU... you can't possibly win this one, Keefy, get over it...
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  #15  
Old 07-12-06, 01:17
Keith Webb's Avatar
Keith Webb Keith Webb is offline
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Default Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Bike!!

Quote:
Originally posted by Geoff Winnington-Ball
On the other hand, me, Hanno and Karmen have admin access on MLU... you can't possibly win this one, Keefy, get over it...
O.K. You win.
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  #16  
Old 07-12-06, 01:30
Geoff Winnington-Ball (RIP)'s Avatar
Geoff Winnington-Ball (RIP) Geoff Winnington-Ball (RIP) is offline
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Default

You bugger! That was too damned easy. I feel deprived...
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  #17  
Old 07-12-06, 01:31
Geoff Winnington-Ball (RIP)'s Avatar
Geoff Winnington-Ball (RIP) Geoff Winnington-Ball (RIP) is offline
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Default

Besides, there are too many embarrassing pics of me out there. I surrender in principle.
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  #18  
Old 07-12-06, 01:33
Keith Webb's Avatar
Keith Webb Keith Webb is offline
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Default Ahah!

Quote:
Originally posted by Geoff Winnington-Ball
Besides, there are too many embarrassing pics of me out there. I surrender in principle.
Looks like a win-win to me.

Don't you love a strategic deterrent!

"Ive come here for an argument."
"No you haven't."
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  #19  
Old 07-12-06, 03:01
Vets Dottir
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Default Re: Re: Re: Re: Bike!!

Quote:
Originally posted by Keith Webb
Oh yeah? Not very far I'd say

Just remember, I have the "power of the DVD revenge." And therefore the ultimate say.
Ah. And I was just about to offer you the use of my to help you to get these guys in line and behaving, but I see you got your own POWER and don't need a lousy little Ma Yappy frying Pan!!!



Ma Yappy Always Ready to Help a Friend Out
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  #20  
Old 07-12-06, 04:42
Geoff Winnington-Ball (RIP)'s Avatar
Geoff Winnington-Ball (RIP) Geoff Winnington-Ball (RIP) is offline
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Default Re: Ahah!

Quote:
Originally posted by Keith Webb
Looks like a win-win to me.

Don't you love a strategic deterrent!

"Ive come here for an argument."
"No you haven't."
"This is Abuse. Try 12A"
"Sorry."
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  #21  
Old 07-12-06, 05:51
Keith Webb's Avatar
Keith Webb Keith Webb is offline
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Default Re: Re: Ahah!

Quote:
Originally posted by Geoff Winnington-Ball
"This is Abuse. Try 12A"
"Sorry."
A reception desk in a sort of office building.
Receptionist
(Rita Davies) Yes, sir?
Man I'd like to have an argument please.
Receptionist Certainly, sir. Have you been here before...?
Man No, this is my first time.
Receptionist I see. Do you want to have the full argument, or were you thinking of taking a course?
Man Well, what would be the cost?
Receptionist Yes, it's one pound for a five-minute argument, but only eight pounds for a course of ten.
Man Well, I think it's probably best if I start with the one and see how it goes from there. OK?
Receptionist Fine. I'll see who's free at the moment ... Mr. Du-Bakey's free, but he's a little bit conciliatory ... yes, try Mr. Barnard - Room 12.
Man Thank you.
The man walks down a corridor. He opens door 12. There is a man at a desk.
Mr Barnard (shouting) What do you want?
Man Well I was told outside ...
Mr Barnard Don't give me that you snotty-faced heap of parrot droppings!
Man What!
Mr Barnard Shut your festering gob you tit! Your type makes me puke! You vacuous toffee-nosed malodorous pervert!
Man Look! I came here for an argument.
Mr Barnard (calmly) Oh! I'm sorry, this is abuse.
Man Oh I see, that explains it.
Mr Barnard No, you want room 12A next door.
Man I see - sorry. (exits)
Mr Barnard Not at all. (as he goes) Stupid git.
Outside 12A. The man knocks on the door.
Mr Vibrating (from within) Come in.
The man enters the room. Mr Vibrating is sitting at a desk.
Man Is this the right room for an argument?
Mr Vibrating I've told you once.
Man No you haven't.
Mr Vibrating Yes I have.
Man When?
Mr Vibrating Just now!
Man No you didn't.
Mr Vibrating Yes I did!
Man Didn't.
Mr Vibrating Did.
Man Didn't.
Mr Vibrating I'm telling you I did!
Man You did not!
Mr Vibrating I'm sorry, is this a five minute argument, or the full half hour?
Man Oh ... Just a five-minute one.
Mr Vibrating Fine (makes a note of it; the man sists down) thank you. Anyway, I did.
Man You most certainly did not.
Mr Vibrating Now, let's get one thing quite clear. I most definitely told you!
Man You did not.
Mr Vibrating Yes I did.
Man Didn't.
Mr Vibrating Yes I did.
Man Didn't.
Mr Vibrating Yes I did!!
Man Look, this isn't an argument.
Mr Vibrating Yes it is.
Man No it isn't, it's just contradiction.
Mr Vibrating No it isn't.
Man Yes it is.
Mr Vibrating It is not.
Man It is. You just contradicted me.
Mr Vibrating No I didn't.
Man Ooh, you did!
Mr Vibrating No, no, no, no, no.
Man You did, just then.
Mr Vibrating No, nonsense!
Man Oh, look this is futile.
Mr Vibrating No it isn't.
Man I came here for a good argument.
Mr Vibrating No you didn't, you came here for an argument.
Man Well, an argument's not the same as contradiction.
Mr Vibrating It can be.
Man No it can't. An argument is a connected series of statements to establish a definite proposition.
Mr Vibrating No it isn't.
Man Yes it is. It isn't just contradiction.
Mr Vibrating Look, if I argue with you, I must take up a contrary position.
Man But it isn't just saying 'No it isn't'.
Mr Vibrating Yes it is.
Man No it isn't, Argument is an intellectual process ... contradiction is just the automatic gainsaying of anything the other person says.
Mr Vibrating No it isn't.
Man Yes it is.
Mr Vibrating Not at all.
Man Now look!
Mr Vibrating (pressing the bell on his desk) That's it. Good morning.
Man But I was just getting interested.
Mr Vibrating Sorry the five minutes is up.
Man That was never five minutes just now!
Mr Vibrating I'm afraid it was.
Man No it wasn't.
Mr Vibrating I'm sorry, I'm not allowed to argue any more.
Man What!?
Mr Vibrating If you want me to go on arguing you'll have to pay for another five minutes.
Man But that was never five minutes just now ... oh Come on! (Vibrating looks round as though man was not there) This is ridiculous.
Mr Vibrating I'm very sorry, but I told you I'm not allowed to argue unless you've paid.
Man Oh. all right. (pays) There you are.
Mr Vibrating Thank you.
Man Well?.
Mr Vibrating Well what?
Man That was never five minutes just now.
Mr Vibrating I told you I'm not allowed to argue unless you've paid!
Man I've just paid.
Mr Vibrating No you didn't.
Man I did! I did! I did!
Mr Vibrating No you didn't.
Man Look I don't want to argue about that.
Mr Vibrating Well I'm very sorry but you didn't pay.
Man Aha! Well if I didn't pay, why are you arguing ... got you!
Mr Vibrating No you haven't.
Man Yes I have ... if you're arguing I must have paid.
Mr Vibrating Not necessarily. I could be arguing in my spare time.
Man I've had enough of this.
Mr Vibrating No you haven't.
Man Oh shut up! (he leaves and sees a door marked complaints; he goes in) I want to complain.
Man in charge You want to complain ... look at these shoes ... I've only had them three weeks and the heels are worn right through.
Man No, I want to complain about ...
Man in charge If you complain nothing happens ... you might just as well not bother. My back hurts and ... (the man exits, walks down the corridor and enters a room)
Man I want to complain. ('Spreaders' who is just inside the door hits man on the head with a mallet) Ooh!
Spreaders No, no, no, hold your head like this, and then go 'waaagh'! Try it again. (he hits him again)
Man Waaghh!
Spreaders Better. Better. But 'waaaaaghh'! 'Waaaagh'! Hold your hands here ...
Man No!
Spreaders Now. (hits him)
Man Waagh!
Spreaders That's it. That's it. Good.
Man Stop hitting me!
Spreaders What?
Man Stop hitting me.
Spreaders Stop hitting you?
Man Yes.
Spreaders What did you come in here for then?
Man I came here to complain.
Spreaders Oh I'm sorry, that's next door. It's being hit on the head lessons in here.
Man What a stupid concept.
Detective Inspector Fox enters
Fox Right. Hold it there.
Man and Spreaders What?
Fox Allow me to introduce myself. I'm Inspector Fox of the Light Entertainment Police, Comedy Division, Special Flying Squad.
Man and Spreaders Flying Fox of the Yard.
Fox Shut up! (he hits the man with a truncheon)
Man Ooooh?
Spreaders No, no, no - Waagh!
Fox And you. (he hits Spreaders)
Spreaders Waagh!
Fox He's good! You could learn a thing or two from him. Right now you two me old beauties, you are nicked.
Man What for?
Fox I'm charging you under Section 21 of the Strange Sketch Act.
Man The what?
Fox You are hereby charged that you did wilfully take part in a strange sketch, that is, a skit, spoof or humorous vignette of an unconventional nature with intent to cause grievous mental confusion to the Great British Public. (to camera) Evening all.
Spreaders It's a fair cop.
Fox And you tosh. (hits the man)
Man WAAAGH!
Fox That's excellent! Right, come on down the Yard.
Another inspector arrives.
Inspector Hold it. Hold it. Allow me to introduce myself. I'm Inspector Thompson's Gazelle of the Programme Planning Police, Light Entertainment Division, Special Flying Squad.
Fox Flying Thompson's Gazelle of the Yard!
Inspector Shut up! (he hits him)
Fox Waaaagh!
Spreaders He's good.
Inspector Shut up! (hits Spreaders)
Spreaders WAAGH!
Man Rotten. (he gets hit) WAAAGH!
Inspector Good. Now I'm arrestin' this entire show on three counts: one, acts of self-conscious behaviour contrary to the 'Not in front of the children' Act, two, always saying 'It's so and so of the Yard' every time the fuzz arrives and, three, and this is the cruncher, offenses against the 'Getting out of sketches without using a proper punchline' Act, four, namely, simply ending every bleedin' sketch by just having a policeman come in and... wait a minute.
Another policeman enters.
Policeman Hold it. (puts his hand on Inspector Thompson's Gazelle's shoulder)
Inspector It's a fair cop.
A large hairy hand appears through the door and claps him on the shoulder.
CAPTION: 'THE END'
Source
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42 FGT No8 (Aust) remains
42 FGT No9 (Aust)
42 F15
42 F15A
Keith Webb
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Also Canadian Military Pattern Vehicles group on Facebook
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  #22  
Old 07-12-06, 05:55
Keith Webb's Avatar
Keith Webb Keith Webb is offline
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Default Off topic?

Maybe, but in a Pythonesque way.
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  #23  
Old 07-12-06, 06:22
Geoff Winnington-Ball (RIP)'s Avatar
Geoff Winnington-Ball (RIP) Geoff Winnington-Ball (RIP) is offline
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Default Threadjacker2000 (tm)

Stupid git!
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  #24  
Old 07-12-06, 22:40
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Tony Smith Tony Smith is offline
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Default Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Bike!!

Quote:
Originally posted by Keith Webb
O.K. You win.
Quote:
Originally posted by Geoff Winnington-Ball
I surrender in principle.
That's what they call a French Standoff!
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  #25  
Old 07-12-06, 22:51
Keith Webb's Avatar
Keith Webb Keith Webb is offline
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Default Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Bike!!

Quote:
Originally posted by Tony Smith
That's what they call a French Standoff!
Damn! Knew I liked camembert too much.
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42 FGT No8 (Aust) remains
42 FGT No9 (Aust)
42 F15
42 F15A
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http://www.imagecontrol.com.au
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  #26  
Old 08-12-06, 01:14
Geoff Winnington-Ball (RIP)'s Avatar
Geoff Winnington-Ball (RIP) Geoff Winnington-Ball (RIP) is offline
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Default Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Bike!!

Quote:
Originally posted by Keith Webb
Damn! Knew I liked camembert too much.
OK, now THAT'S disgusting. EWWWW!!!!!!
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  #27  
Old 08-12-06, 01:15
Geoff Winnington-Ball (RIP)'s Avatar
Geoff Winnington-Ball (RIP) Geoff Winnington-Ball (RIP) is offline
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Default Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Bike!!

Quote:
Originally posted by Tony Smith
That's what they call a French Standoff!
Anything like a 'French Letter'?
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  #28  
Old 08-12-06, 01:19
Geoff Winnington-Ball (RIP)'s Avatar
Geoff Winnington-Ball (RIP) Geoff Winnington-Ball (RIP) is offline
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Default Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Re: Bike!!

Quote:
Originally posted by Keith Webb
Damn! Knew I liked camembert too much.
This'll learn ya...

Quote:
Customer: Good Morning.
Owner: Good morning, Sir. Welcome to the National Cheese Emporium!
Customer: Ah, thank you, my good man.
Owner: What can I do for you, Sir?
C: Well, I was, uh, sitting in the public library on Thurmon Street just now,
skimming through "Rogue Herrys" by Hugh Walpole, and I suddenly came over
all peckish.
O: Peckish, sir?
C: Esuriant.
O: Eh?
C: 'Ee, Ah wor 'ungry-loike!
O: Ah, hungry!
C: In a nutshell. And I thought to myself, "a little fermented curd will do
the trick," so, I curtailed my Walpoling activites, sallied forth, and
infiltrated your place of purveyance to negotiate the vending of some cheesy
comestibles!
O: Come again?
C: I want to buy some cheese.
O: Oh, I thought you were complaining about the bazouki player!
C: Oh, heaven forbid: I am one who delights in all manifestations of the
Terpsichorean muse!
O: Sorry?
C: 'Ooo, Ah lahk a nice tuune, 'yer forced too!
O: So he can go on playing, can he?
C: Most certainly! Now then, some cheese please, my good man.
O: (lustily) Certainly, sir. What would you like?
C: Well, eh, how about a little red Leicester.
O: I'm, a-fraid we're fresh out of red Leicester, sir.
C: Oh, never mind, how are you on Tilsit?
O: I'm afraid we never have that at the end of the week, sir, we get it
fresh on Monday.
C: Tish tish. No matter. Well, stout yeoman, four ounces of Caerphilly, if
you please.
O: Ah! It's beeeen on order, sir, for two weeks. Was expecting it this
morning.
C: 'T's Not my lucky day, is it? Aah, Bel Paese?
O: Sorry, sir.
C: Red Windsor?
O: Normally, sir, yes. Today the van broke down.
C: Ah. Stilton?
O: Sorry.
C: Ementhal? Gruyere?
O: No.
C: Any Norweigan Jarlsburg, per chance.
O: No.
C: Lipta?
O: No.
C: Lancashire?
O: No.
C: White Stilton?
O: No.
C: Danish Brew?
O: No.
C: Double Goucester?
O: No.
C: Cheshire?
O: No.
C: Dorset Bluveny?
O: No.
C: Brie, Roquefort, Pol le Veq, Port Salut, Savoy Aire, Saint Paulin, Carrier
de lest, Bres Bleu, Bruson?
O: No.
C: Camenbert, perhaps?
O: Ah! We have Camenbert, yessir.
C: (suprised) You do! Excellent.
O: Yessir. It's..ah,.....it's a bit runny...
C: Oh, I like it runny.
O: Well,.. It's very runny, actually, sir.
C: No matter. Fetch hither the fromage de la Belle France! Mmmwah!
O: I...think it's a bit runnier than you'll like it, sir.
C: I don't care how ****ing runny it is. Hand it over with all speed.
O: Oooooooooohhh........!
C: What now?
O: The cat's eaten it.
C: Has he.
O: She, sir.
(pause)
C: Gouda?
O: No.
C: Edam?
O: No.
C: Case Ness?
O: No.
C: Smoked Austrian?
O: No.
C: Japanese Sage Darby?
O: No, sir.
C: You...do *have* some cheese, don't you?
O: (brightly) Of course, sir. It's a cheese shop, sir. We've got--
C: No no... don't tell me. I'm keen to guess.
O: Fair enough.
C: Uuuuuh, Wensleydale.
O: Yes?
C: Ah, well, I'll have some of that!
O: Oh! I thought you were talking to me, sir.
Mister Wensleydale, that's my name.

(pause)

C: Greek Feta?
O: Uh, not as such.
C: Uuh, Gorgonzola?
O: no
C: Parmesan,
O: no
C: Mozarella,
O: no
C: Paper Cramer,
O: no
C: Danish Bimbo,
O: no
C: Czech sheep's milk,
O: no
C: Venezuelan Beaver Cheese?
O: Not *today*, sir, no.
(pause)
C: Aah, how about Cheddar?
O: Well, we don't get much call for it around here, sir.
C: Not much ca--It's the single most popular cheese in the world!
O: Not 'round here, sir.
C: and what IS the most popular cheese 'round hyah?
O: 'Illchester, sir.
C: IS it.
O: Oh, yes, it's staggeringly popular in this manusquire.
C: Is it.
O: It's our number one best seller, sir!
C: I see. Uuh...'Illchester, eh?
O: Right, sir.
C: All right. Okay.
'Have you got any?' he asked, expecting the answer 'no'.
O: I'll have a look, sir...
nnnnnnnnnnnnnnnno.
C: It's not much of a cheese shop, is it?
O: Finest in the district!
C: (annoyed) Explain the logic underlying that conclusion, please.
O: Well, it's so clean, sir!
C: It's certainly uncontaminated by cheese....
O: (brightly) You haven't asked me about Limburger, sir.
C: Would it be worth it?
O: Could be....
C: Have you --SHUT THAT BLOODY BAZOUKI OFF!
O: Told you sir....
C: (slowly) Have you got any Limburger?
O: No.
C: Figures.
Predictable, really I suppose. It was an act of purest optimism to have
posed the question in the first place. Tell me:
O: Yessir?
C: (deliberately) Have you in fact got any cheese here at all.
O: Yes,sir.
C: Really?
(pause)
O: No. Not really, sir.
C: You haven't.
O: Nosir. Not a scrap. I was deliberately wasting your time,sir.
C: Well I'm sorry, but I'm going to have to shoot you.
O: Right-0, sir.

The customer takes out a gun and shoots the owner.

C: What a *senseless* waste of human life.
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  #29  
Old 08-12-06, 03:30
Keith Webb's Avatar
Keith Webb Keith Webb is offline
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Join Date: Feb 2003
Location: Eltham, Victoria, Australia
Posts: 8,120
Talking Cheese shop sketch

An absolute classic!
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42 FGT No8 (Aust) remains
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  #30  
Old 08-12-06, 12:22
Rusty Rusty is offline
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Location: Southern Tablelands
Posts: 199
Default Hey Keefy did you say Bike Rider Required

Keefy if your bikes got gears, I'm your man.
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