A question of some delicacy...

[servicepub (RIP)]

I have heard the same sad story over and over. Guy dies, never told his wife what his stuff was worth, wife dispose of it real cheap, total strangers benefit from the deal of a life-time (variant, Dead guys best friends swarm widow with offers to take stuff off her hands/dispose of collection for her).
In either event the wife ends up losing significant dollars at a time when she could probably use them.

My suggestion is that we include a letter with the will that outlines the rough monetary value of the bigger items (the C8 or the VC) as well as a rough value of the entire collection. Identify specific items that will be of interest to individual friends. Identify the friend or dealer with whom you have already discussed disposal and clearly indicate the terms of the deal (20% plus costs, etc...).

For those one-of-a-kind items that you want to go to a specific museum ensure that they are clearly identified and make sure beforehand that the institution will accept them.

Most collectors/museums donn't want your entire collection and will cherry-pick to get the rare items or those items needed to fill a gap. All of our collections have tons of common stuff and these take the most work to dispose of. This is where a trust-worthy dealer can help out the most. They usually need this stuff as stock but won't pay top dollar.

It's OK (well, typical) to keep our hobby spending secret from our wives otherwise they would kill us. But once that point is moot then let them know what the value is in order that they can benefit.